Knight In Shining Armor
by raiTonight29
Summary: He got himself a girlfriend. You got yourself a medal. He had moved on. You were stuck. Crippled by your guilt and self-pity. But you told yourself it was fine and that you were okay with it. But then, why did you hear your heart break? Eventual RoyJean.
1. His Happily Ever After

This is a two-part fic. And I hope it makes proper sense. Because this bunny that bit me was rabid. And I had to get it off my system. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters therein. They all rightfully belong to Hiromu Arakawa.**

**Warning:** This is a shounen-Ai fic. So please. If you don't like it, then don't read. I don't want any reviews saying, "Fuck you! This sucks! Maes belongs to Gracia! You homophobe!" I am nothing of the sort. I have nothing against GraciaMaes. I find this pairing too beautiful to be disgusted about it. So please. If you don't like it, hit the BACK button and pretend you never saw this fic.

**Knight in Shining Armor**

**Part I: His Happily Ever After**

He was at Central. Doing a desk job.

You were at the front lines. Destroying families and slaughtering innocent lives.

He got himself a girlfriend.

You got yourself a medal.

He had moved on.

You were stuck. Crippled by your guilt and self-pity.

You sit in front of the fire. Contemplating. What do you think would happen if things had been different? Would the two of you still be together if you had not gone off to war? If you had not left his side? If he had not met that very kind lady?

Would things have turned out different?

You had written letters to him.

He didn't reply.

And you returned broken and cold… paralyzed by the sins and demons that have decided to settle on your shoulders. Your innocence was gone the moment you took your first step on Ishval grounds and now nightmares gape menacingly at you, opening their deep and pitch black mouths at you, daring you to enter.

You expected him to be there when you return. To embrace you and tell you that everything was going to be okay… that things were going to be the same as if you hadn't left at all. To soothe your pains and to drive your nightmares away. That he was going to be your knight in shining armor.

But you find out the truth as to why he doesn't send replies to your letters anymore.

He was embracing someone else…soothing another's heartache. And was being _their_ knight in shining armor.

You had loved him.

He had loved you, too.

You still love him.

He doesn't feel the same for you anymore.

But you thought, "Hey, that's okay. You're not together anymore, right?" You decided that on the night before you went off to war. To kill. You completely understand. That he could not love someone with blood in their hands. Who has killed numerous innocent lives... That your lover could not love you because you weren't perfect anymore…

You had killed.

Who could- would love a murderer like you?

Yet you smile because you completely understand.

But why did you hear your heart break?

Why did you cry the night when you learned he loved somebody else?

"Gracia and I are getting married." You heard him say that at the middle of one of Central headquarters' hallways.

You stop dead in your tracks as you processed the new heart-breaking information. Information that you rather not hear but heard anyway. Your heart twisted in animalistic coils before breaking once again.

You had lived in false hope. That one day, he was going to come back to you and say that he was sorry for hurting you.

But that hope shattered along with your heart. And you felt that all hell had broken loose. You turn cold and your mind sent frantic messages to your limbs. Because somehow, your legs shook and your heart refused pumping.

No.

Maes was just kidding! That's right! This was his way of saying he was sorry. That once you turn around to face him he would grab you and tell you he was joking.

So you turn to him and he start hitting him behind the back, laughing, "Hahah! What a belly buster, Maes! And to think I actually believed you for a second!" you tried to say happily. But you felt silent tears stream down your face as you did so. And you know that you were crying for yourself. About how pathetic you were for allowing this kind of pain to get to you. You cry because in this world, nobody could ever love you anymore. Now that the only one that had promised to love you, doesn't love you any longer.

Because you weren't beautiful anymore. You weren't perfect anymore. Your hands were tainted with blood and shame. And you could feel the accusing fingers pointed at you. _'You murderer! You don't deserve to be happy! You killed us! You killed us! Murderer!' _

And when you look up you will see their faces; bloody and dirty.

You felt him grab and hug you tightly. He knew you were hurting because you started sobbing and shaking. You repeatedly ask him the same question over and over again. As he led you into an empty office: "Why?"

He said that he still loved you but he had to stop it because he had loved someone else. And you felt your blood boil inside of you as you resisted the urge to start shoving things around.

You straighten up suddenly and you smiled sadly at him with tears in the brim of your eyes.

_(Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors, Roy…)_

You stood on tiptoe to kiss him lightly on the lips. Your final kiss. Your happy ending turned to squander.

You break away and you wipe the tears from your eyes to give him your best smile. Your last smile for him and for yourself. Because you know you could never smile like this ever again. Now that your knight in shining armor has fallen for another. You weren't a beautiful princess, like Gracia. You were a sinful murderer. Now, who would love a murderer?

"Major Hughes." You began, "Congratulations. I hope you find your 'happily ever after'."_ Because I gave up on mine… _you did not say.

'_How's this?' _You thought as you flashed him your brightest smile but obstructed it when a single tear ran down your quivering cheek.

_Is my smile good enough?_

**O: O: O: O: O: O: O: O: O:**

A/N: And so… part one ends. Constructive criticism is welcome because I know it helps me become a better author. This is my first shot at HughesRoy so please go easy on me. I know it was cheesy and Roy was completely OOC. I think it would look good if I turn it to Fem!Roy. But then, many wouldn't like it. … But… oh well…

PLEASE REVIEW!


	2. Your Happily Ever After

**Knight in Shining Armor**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters therein. They all rightfully belong to Hiromu Arakawa.**

**Part II: Your Happily Ever After**

You walk alone in an empty hallway. You had your uniform on. Pressed and pristine.

Your mask firmly in place. But your heart in pieces.

You hear footsteps coming from the other end of the hall. And even without looking you knew who it was by the gait alone. How could you not?

You almost spent all your life with him. How couldn't you not know the person who personally broke your heart?

How could you not?

Inevitably, you see him coming towards you. And then his eyes met yours.

It was written in his face, how worried he was for you. And he stopped in his tracks just as you did. You stared at him while hyou fought frantically to keep your emotions in check.

But the longing was still there. The longing that he'd take a step forward and hug you and tell you that it was a huge mistake. That he still loved you.

The longing of throwing yourself unto his arms and forget about the world for a moment while you bathe on the bliss and safety as his arms tighten around you.

The longing was still there.

But your face was blank and calm.

But the longing of taking one step forward was there, too.

You smile up at him with your eyes closed. And you took a deep breath and sidestepped out of the way. And proceeded to walk around him.

And you knew from his stance alone that he was stunned. But you don't talk to him anymore. And you wished he'd believe you when you'd say that it was not because you didn't want to. But it was just that everything you wanted to say to him you can't tell him anymore.

**O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:**

Empty weeks turned to lonely months and eventually numbing years. You learned how to keep yourself away from people you didn't trust. And you surrounded yourself with the people you knew who could protect themselves.

Because you knew that you could not survive another heartache.

Your heart was trampled on when finally his wedding day came. And you were his best man. And you smiled the whole fucking day. But you wanted him to be happy. Because that was how much you loved him. Because you knew that holding on is not always what makes you stronger but sometimes it was letting go. But then you noticed your face hurt the next day.

Your heart was smothered when you saw him dragging a little girl around with him one day but you killed the tears that threatened to invade your eyes. And you saw how happy he was that he had a child. And you knew that letting go of him was the right thing to do.

Look how happy he is. You tell yourself. You did the right thing, letting go of him. Yes, you did. But you knew you could even make him happier. That you could have done much better than that. But it was never meant to be.

He had loved another princess. And he was happy with her. That was obvious. And now he had another angel he should care for. He had another princess to be a knight in shining armor for. And you realized that he doesn't have a place for you in his heart anymore.

But that was alright. As long as he was happy.

And even if you were all alone without anybody to love you, you were alright with that. Because you knew life was always unfair.

But then…

You never noticed him before.

Because he merely watched from the sidelines.

He always sees everything. From every tear that drops from your midnight blue eyes to every scar in your cold heart.

He sees everything.

But you never noticed him.

And you never realized someone loved you from the very beginning. From the very first teardrop he saw spill from your eyes.

But you never noticed. You never did. And you didn't care.

You took him for granted everyday.

He would bring you your paperwork and coffee; a half cup of milk and three spoonfuls of sugar. He knew your taste and he would smile at you before exiting. And a faint lingering scent of tobacco would hang on every wall of your office.

And then, for some reason, you find yourself smiling down at your mug of coffee.

…_a half cup of milk and three spoonfuls of sugar…_

And you felt your heart slowly mending. One piece at a time.

He silently loved you. And you started noticing him. And once, you smiled up to him and you never knew how happy he was that you _did_.

And the morning after that, you find a single flower on your desk. It was a lovely Snowdrop and a small note was attached to it and it contained only one small word but you found yourself smiling down at its simplicity.

'_Hope.'_

And that was when you decided that it was time to start standing up again. Yes, hope. Someone was always bound to love you despite your flaws and shortcomings. No one walked this earth and had nobody else to love them. You always lose but then you gain something in return. Equivalent Exchange.

You look up and you find him within the threshold of your office. Looking handsome and strong. His innocent sapphire blue eyes locked with yours and you realize with sudden cruelty that you weren't beautiful or charming anymore. You were a murderer. Your innocence was robbed from you during the Ishval rebellion.

You smile sadly up to him as you grab the innocent bloom from your table. You slowly near him and you saw how he looked at you, full of love and awe, and you blush.

The top of your head barely reached his chin and you lean up to him to place a light chaste kiss on his cheek. You grab his hand and you return the blossom back to him.

"I'm sorry, Jean…" you say sadly, dropping that commanding officer façade for him; because that was what you were only capable of, "But… I am not for you. You deserve someone better. I am not worth being loved."

You hear a low growl and you look up to see him glaring at you. But you stood your ground. As much as you want to feel being loved again you didn't want to risk being hurt for a second time.

Because you know your heart cannot be fixed again. It was like glass. If it broke you're better off now fixing it because you'll only hurt yourself if you do.

This man before you would learn everything about you and would eventually leave you for a much more beautiful princess. And you'd start mending your heart all over again. And this time, you might not heal it any longer.

You have had enough of believing that you were still capable of being loved. You didn't want to hurt anymore. Why go all over the heartbreak again when you're fine alone? You stay away and you're fine, right?... And you knew it was for the best. Havoc was a good man. And he deserved a princess. Not a sinner like you.

You turn on your heels to approach your cluttered desk to start on your never-ending stack of paperwork when a firm grip around your elbow stopped you from taking another step away. And you felt yourself being twisted around and the next thing you know you were staring into cerulean blue irises.

"I know what I want, sir," you saw him smile, "And what I want is to be with you…"

You turn you face away, knowing that you couldn't stop the blush that dusted your cheeks because you felt your heart shoot way up into air to celebrate.

"You can't," you began, your face still turned away, "I…"

"You don't understand, do you, Colonel?" you heard him say and your head snapped up to him. You saw him smile and you couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at him and "Huh?" was the most intelligent syllable you could have thought of.

And if possible, his grin only grew wider. You stare at him and the words bolted out of your mouth and now you were speechless. Silenced by the way he looked past your pretty face and into your very soul. And you flinched; terrified that he might see _all _of you. But you felt a warm hand under your chin and you found yourself not being able to look away.

"I'm falling for you, Roy." He said, and you felt his arm snake around your slender waist and for a moment you felt safe. And your heart fluttered and your stomach somersaulted.

Because you knew… with that simple act and with those five words: this man was different.

"I promise you I'd take care of you."

He wouldn't hurt you.

"I'd make you smile."

He wouldn't make you cry.

"I'd love you despite your flaws."

He'd accept you for who you are. He was willing to know more of you and not be disgusted about it.

"I'd love you forever."

He wouldn't break your heart.

"Please let me _be_ there for you."

He would be your knight in shining armor.

"Please let me love you."

He'd be your guardian angel.

"Please let me know you more."

He'd love you.

"Please make me yours."

He'd LOVE you!

"Yes…" he whisper softly and you felt hot tears form on the rim of your eyes. Here was what you were waiting for. This was the person who you were destined for.

"Little one?" he asked softly and the tears did roll off your eyes when you heard the pet name. And you bury your head in his chest. Crying out of extreme joy.

Here was the person who'd love you with your demons. Who'd fight your inner demons with you.

Who'd be your knight in shining armor forever.

"Yes… Thank you, Jean…"

"I love you, Roy…"

You don't give your answer yet, instead you smile. But he smiles back at you and with that you knew that it was alright with him. That he doesn't expect your answer know. Because he knows that you are still beginning to heal.

And he had to woo you first before he got it.

"Make me fall in love with you…" You whisper softly. And he only hugs you tighter. But that was enough.

Your heart was mending after all.

And you smile. Because, sometimes all you need is a broken heart to realize that something even better is right in front of our eyes, just waiting to be found.

**O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:**

A/N: And it ends. :D I hope you enjoyed this little bunny. I know it was cheesy and very very lame and emo-ish but I had to let it all out. Writing has always been my alternative to crying and sulking. I get to express myself more. :D

I'm thinking of making a sequel for this. If my pet bunnies let me and if school approves of it, too. It has been demanding for my time a lot. O_o… But I'm not promising anything. ^_^

And also thank you to everyone who reviewed/favorited/alerted this little fanfiction. You are all very wonderful people. ^_^

**Please review! I'd pretty much appreciate it!**

But no flames please. :D


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